Now that I've told the story, here's the thing: it didn't really
happen. I didn't really fall down a well and die. Rather, I created
the experience of falling down a well just to see if I could create
a real experience out of nothing. All the physical
sensations were there. Everything was there that
goeswith falling down a well (as
may have said). I proved to myself I can author my experience -
With some experiences, I'm clear I'm the author. With others, they
seem to happen to me. I have no sense of mastery over
them, no sense of authoring them.
Whichever is "true", ultimately I take the stand it's
for me not to own my own experience. And if I don't own my own
experience, I at least own my own reaction to my
experience. Even when I don't get I'm the author of the events
themselves, I'm clear I'm the author of my reactions to the events,
them, what I make up about them.
If not, I'm just a pussy in a well.