Conversations For Transformation: Essays Inspired By The Ideas Of Werner Erhard

Conversations For Transformation

Essays By Laurence Platt

Inspired By The Ideas Of Werner Erhard

And More


I Do What I Am

Cowboy Cottage, East Napa, California, USA

April 19, 2012



"Be. Do. Have."  ... 
This essay, I Do What I Am, is the companion piece to
  1. Blue Screen And The Prism: A Composition In Two Movements
  2. Disclaimer
in that order.




Whenever I'm asked why I write these Conversations For Transformation (and I'm asked why often), my response over these past nine years has consistently been the same. It's "Because I do.". Or it's "Because this is what I do.".

For those who aren't ready for a Zen answer, "Because I do" can be puzzling, perplexing, even infuriating. They'll say this answer is incomplete, confusing, even evasive - as if  there's really another  answer, the real  answer which they assume, for reasons known only to myself, I'm holding back or avoiding sharing. It's assumed that because I don't give a rational, sensible  answer ie an explanation, I must be ducking the issue. It's more than that actually. It's because I don't give a rational, sensible answer to why, it's assumed Conversations For Transformation are somehow invalid.

Listen: if you try to filter Zen through what's rational, or through what makes sense, give up! There's definitely no hope. You'll never  get it that way ...

No, I'm not holding anything back. Really I'm not. This is  the answer: "I write these Conversations For Transformation because I write these Conversations For Transformation.". And given these are Conversations For Transformation after all, this arguably Zen answer isn't just an appropriate answer in the genre:  it really is the truthful  answer, the actual answer, and (if you're willing to fully afford Zen all its sublime, awesome power) it's the accurate  answer - bottom line.

There are two distinctions in play here. The first is this: who I really am, who we  really are, the Self  I really am, the Self we really are, doesn't exist for a reason  - it just is. We love to explain ourselves. Man! We really love  to explain ourselves, don't we? Go on, tell the truth ...  But even if and when I can't explain myself, I still unavoidably am!  As dearly as we hold onto the age old belief "Everything happens for a reason", requiring a reason for already being, is naïve. It's also an impediment to total transformation.

I assert things don't  happen "for a reason". Rather, things happen because they happen. Everything else is simply conjecture and commentary, which leads to significance and a story  through which to live Life rather than simply living Life  ... that, plus a hopelessly futile attempt to living Life ... that, plus a hopelessly futile attempt to avoid the dominance of the what's so  world in which it's the way it is because it's the way it is, and it's the way it isn't because it's the way it isn't. Conversations For Transformation are an expression of the Self at play in the what's so world. Therefore, appropriately, there's no reason for writing them. I write them because I write them.

There's also a second distinction in play here, and it's this: who I really am, who we really are, the Self I really am, the Self we really are, is constituted in language  (as Werner Erhard may have said). In this way, Conversations For Transformation, being an obvious expression of language (but more than that: being a particular  expression of language), allow who I really am, who we really are, the Self I really am, the Self we really are, to come forth and play. And for this to work, there's nothing requested of you except your listening. The speaking of the language I'm constituted in, is in a dance  with the listening of the language you're constituted in.

So if you ask me why I write Conversations For Transformation, I'll say (as you now know I will) "Because I do.". Conversations For Transformation are who I really am, who we really are, the Self I really am, the Self we really are, at play in the what's so world. And in the what's so world, I write who I am.

If I'm accurate and authentic expressing who I really am ie if I'm accurate and authentic coming from  who I really am, you'll get who you  really are simply by listening. Notice for this to happen, I don't have to write about  who I am. Writing about who I am may be useful. It may even be interesting. But this action isn't required  for the project to work. Coming from who I am, what I unavoidably write is who I am. In other words, coming from who I am, what I unavoidably do  is who I am. Said another way, in a context of transformation I do what I am  - which is to say, I do what I really  am (by the way, that's all I do, and that's all I'll ever  do).

With Conversations For Transformation ie for the Conversations For Transformation project to work, this action is  required.



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