She said she was going through a phase in which she was uninspired,
undriven, a phase in which she was delaying getting out of bed in the
morning - that's aka being in a "funk". "Oh? What's it like?" I asked.
She was taken aback. It wasn't the kind of response she was expecting.
"I don't know why I'm like this" she continued. "Really? Do you
think
that if you did know why, it would make a big difference?" I asked,
"Tell me this: would you also want to know why, if you woke up
happy
and bounding into the day with alacrity,
aliveness,
and energy? Would you ask why if that was how you got out of bed in the
morning?".
She was really taken aback with that last question, more so than
before. "That's a really ... great ...
question" she
mused
slowly, contemplatively. Now the truth is when people respond to your
questions with "That's a really great question", we all know that
they are not complimenting you on your interrogation skills. What
they're really saying is "You got me. I never thought of / looked at it
that way before", a not-so-direct way of confirming it's bang on
the money.
Somehow, we've got it that waking up
happy
and bounding into the day with alacrity,
aliveness,
and energy is the way we are s'posed to be in the morning,
whereas being uninspired, undriven, and delaying getting out of bed in
the morning, isn't. Look: when we're being the former, we never ask
why, and when we're being the latter, we almost always ask why. That's
how we hold them in a rationalized,
addicted-to-being-explained world. Whys are purely
selective.
Now consider that in a what's so world, the answer to "Why
am I uninspired, undriven, delaying getting out of bed in the morning?"
is just "I'm uninspired, undriven, delaying getting out of bed in the
morning because I'm uninspired, undriven, delaying getting
out of bed in the morning.". It is patently getable.
What's not so getable is the answer to the question "Why am I waking up
happy
and bounding into the day with alacrity,
aliveness,
and energy?" is similarly "I'm waking up
happy
and bounding into the day with alacrity,
aliveness,
and energy because I'm waking up
happy
and bounding into the day with alacrity,
aliveness,
and energy.". That's how we hold them in a what's so world. A what's so
world is always available when it's not obfuscated by our
selectiveness.
"Notice" I said "how we're thrown to fretfully ask why the world is the
way it is. We live in the rationalized, explained world. See if you can
live in the world exactly as it is ie see if you can try
on living in a what's so world, a world in which things are the
way they are because they're the way they are, a world in
which rationalizations and explanations are optional. It's just
a suggestion that you try this on. You can always reclaim your
rationalizations and explanations later. The thing is you already know
what it's like living in a rationalized, explained world. Now would be
a great time to try on living in a what's so world.".
There's an inquiry to access what it's like living in a what's so
world. It's this: who am I being, living in a rationalized, explained
world? and: who am I being, living in a what's so world?". Engage with
it. It's an utterly transformative inquiry to be in. But to get the
most value from it, you might have to be willing to give up who (or
what) you're already very comfortable being - at least temporarily.
"Just bracket it off / set it aside" I said, "You can always reclaim it
later.".