During this epic inquiry I've been in and am still in as I ongoingly
discover for myself
what it is to be a
human being transformed,
and what gets in my way of living my life transformed, I'm trying on
Werner's
idea of taking responsibility for it all. It's a daunting one,
and a mighty one - and mightily misconstrued (indeed, I myself am an
ex-misconstrue-er). Where there's responsibility in my life, I have
power and leverage. Yet the idea of taking responsibility for it
all? Like taking responsibility for
the rain,
the tides,
the Earth
spinning on its axis? That never occurred as within reach. That just
seemed beyond the scope of what's possible for
human beings.
Whether I take responsibility for
the rain,
the tides, or
the Earth
spinning on its axis, or not, it still
rains,
the tides still ebb and flow, and
the Earth
still spins ie it all happens anyway. So what is it exactly for
me to take responsibility for it all in a way that gives leverage?
Here's what I got: if there's leverage in taking responsibility for it
all, it
begins
with me taking responsibility for my experience of it all.
I got that
being around Werner.
That's the
access
to real power! That's the
gamechanger.
When we're being responsible for our experience of it all, we're being
cause in the matter of
our experience of what happens, whether or not it's true
that we
cause what happens.
Look: it may not be true that what happens, happens
because we
cause what happens("because ..." is after all,
a superstition).
So other than being able to bring our
observations
to bear, we may have less power over what happens than our folk lore
and
superstitions
account for or agree to (I did say "may" be).
As a matter of a responsibility of a higher order, I do seem to have
power in the matter of my own experience of what's happening. What
first shows up simply as my default view of what's happening, is
transformed when I
bring my language to bear
on my experience of what's happening, recognizing that "is" (as in
"This is what's happening ...") is also
a superstition.
If that lands for you as far-fetched, unhinged, or flat-out wrong, join
the club (hint: don't listen it as a fact - it's a
possibility).
Slowly it dawned on me that what happens, is what I say
happens. That's powerful. What happens,
beginning
with my experience of what happens, is a function of what I say happens
ie of
my languaging of it.
There is no "is", so there's no "is happens"
outside of my experience of and what I say happens. And in
my language
as a matter of my integrity, I have zero tolerance for
lying about what I experience happens (that's a conversation for
another occasion). Consider this: if what happens is "what I
say happens", then what happens is not "what
happens". That's a
confusing paradox
if ever there was one. Whether or not it's true that
I do cause what happens,
I'll stake / ante (ie I'm willing look at my life) from the vantage
point that I at least
cause my experience of what
happens
ie from the vantage point that I'm responsible for my own experience of
what happens. And that gives me
access
to having leverage in the matter of taking responsibility for it all,
as the alternative to being bounced around on the game tables of life
like the puck in a Carroms game or the ball in
Bagatelle and / or Pinball ie like just
another
victim of circumstance.
When I look at my life from the vantage point of causing / being
responsible for my own experience, it's clearly incongruent with
blaming others for my experience. So I infer it's a
requirement I forfeit my right to blame others for my
experience if I intend to
honor
my ownership of my experience, and the leverage doing so brings.
When I forfeit my right to blame others for my experience, I regain
ownership of my experience, I regain the power to transform my life ie
I regain stewardship of my own transformation. That's the wealth that
comes from taking responsibility for it all,
access
to which
begins
with us taking responsibility for our experience of it all.