I am indebted to Curt Hill who inspired this conversation, and to
who contributed material.
When I first got
it altered my reality - that is to say, it altered reality.
Much has been spoken about and much has been written about erroneously
as "out there". Misconceiving
"out-here" as "out
there" is entirely predictable, given how we're thrown to
who we are
- restated with
"... given how we're thrown to be about where we are". I'm
talking about how we're thrown to locate our experience of
who we arein space.
The way we're thrown to be about where we are, the way we're thrown to
locate our experience of
who we are
in space, is "I'm
..." (pointing to my head) "...
and the world is out there ..." (pointing away from my
head towards the world). That's the thrown misconception.
OK, lets say I accept it's a misconception. Let's say for argument's
sake I accept I'm not
(pointing to my head). Then where am I? Out there?
(pointing away from my head towards the world).
Try this on for size: the accurate expression isn't "I'm out
there" (pointing away from my head towards the world). Saying
it that way ironically only serves to further trap me
(pointing to my head). Try on the accurate expression is I'm
(with a sweeping gesture for
rather than pointing in any particular direction).
That's what altered reality for me. It doesn't really do much good
It does even less good trying to
understand it. But it's an idea which can be gotten and
is a matter of shifting my experience from being
That's why once I get
I have a new frame of reference, a new
for my life. But it's more than that actually - it's waaay
more. It's a frame of reference for
Given Life as it's lived is
(with a sweeping gesture for
rather than pointing in any particular direction) rather than
(pointing to my head), it simply
better to live Life
out-herewhere Life is lived.
No mystery here.
A New Facet To The Diamond
Then one day recently I discovered another piece of this
distinction, a new facet to the diamond. Even without this new
discovery, the distinction
is awesome, life-changing, reality altering. And
with this new discovery, it's outright
I was watching a friend at work leading a
I've watched him lead
and participated in a few of them myself for over fifteen years. He's
good, very good at what he does. This time I noticed he
was no longer very good at what he does. He had, in the interim since I
last watched him working, become off the charts brilliant
at what he does. He was
in a way I'd not experienced him before. Watching him, I could tell he
was completely being with the people in
He was completely being with the material he was
presenting. The way he was completely being with the room ie with the
physical space got me sitting up and paying
in a way I'd not sat up and paid
before - and if there's one thing about me you should know, it's I
always sit up and pay
It was truly awesome, a veritable tour de force.
Later I shared my experience of him with another friend. I told her how
newly and powerfully
he was in the room. And this is what I said verbatim: I said "He was
really out there in the room, really out there in his
expression.". And my friend interrupted me, saying "No, he wasn't
out there. He was
And I actually thought to myself "She doesn't get it ...".
I had it that
is a way of being for me ... or for whomever the first
person speaker is. What my friend was being in the seminar was out
there in the room. That's how I would say it about
him. I had it that I could only say
out-hereabout myself ... or it could be said by whomever the first
person speaker is, about themselves. What my friend was being in
the seminar was out there ... at least in my estimation.
Then this dawned on me: it was I who didn't get
completely - not her. This is the other piece to
the new facet to the diamond:
is not only an experience I (or whomever the first person speaker is)
express about myself. It's an experience I (or whomever the first
person speaker is) also express about another. I had it that
when I share my own experience, I say "I'm
(speaking about myself). I had it that when another shares his own
experience, he also says "I'm
(speaking about himself). But when I speak about
another then I would say "He's out there", and when
another speaks about me then he would say
"He's out there.". It's a simple matter of spatial projection -
or so I thought ...