"I
truly
did need to be educated. And
God
did take me and educate me - unconventionally, and veryprivately;
for a long
time
no one, including myself, knew anything was
happening."
That's counter-intuitive. We're thrown to want to change things ie
we're thrown to want to move things in the direction of
the way
they
could
be and / or of
the way
they
should
be, and certainly of
the way
we'd like them to be. That's what conventional education
says regarding what to do about
the way things are. But
I've been educated un-conventionally (and not a moment too soon)
and I propose
relating
to things based on our
interpretations
and our
opinions
and our preferences, may not be all it's cracked up to be. We
pride ourselves in espousing the
interpretations
and the
opinions
and the preferences we've formed about things. No, it's more than just
pride actually. It's we'll unhesitatingly go to war citing
us and them's conflicting
interpretations,
opinions,
and preferences. Far fetched? Not so much. It's
true.
We vigorously defend our
interpretations
and our
opinions
and our preferences. The
trouble
with this approach, is the
universe
(frankly, my dear) doesn't give a damn about our
interpretations
or about our
opinions
or about our preferences. I assert we all, deep in our
hearts,
suspect this to be
true.
But we just can't bring ourselves to admit it actually isthe truth,
and to include it. We're too intimidated by its domination.
In my experience of the good and decent conventional education I
received, I was required to learn to think for myself, which in and of
itself, sounded like a good idea. It was only much later that I
discovered two inherently insurmountable problems with it. The first
was:
howcould
I ever learn to really think for myself when (if I tell
the truth
about it) I
truly
had no clue as to who (or what) this thing called "myself" really was?
The second was:
could
I ever really (quote unquote) think for myself when even
my most rudimentary
observations
of my own thinking, revealed my thoughts come and go by themselves
automatically, a process which required neither my participation nor my
intervention? Oh wait: isn't the idea of "thinking for myself" as
ridiculously ie as charmingly naïve as the idea of
"raining
for myself"?
According to many esteemed studies of the
human
personality, everything about the "myself" that we
consider
ourselves to be, was formed, underscored, emphasized, accepted, and
locked in place by the
time
we were four years old. And when it was locked in place, it didn't
display or sound any warning that it's not
who we really are.
Nothing
in this "myself" ever
stands up
and declares
truthfully
"I'm an
impostor.
I'm really not this 'myself' thing I pretend to be (even though I
play
one on TV).". For me, for the next twenty four years, this "myself"
waswho I really am.
Then I met
Werner.
And that's when (as Elvis Aaron Presley may have said) things got
all shook up.
It takes a certain unconventional education to learn to discard this
bonded, riveted identification with the false "myself", let alone
question
its
tyranny.
But that's not all. What's utterly, jaw-droppingly
remarkable about this
state
of
affairs
is: until it's unraveled (or
solved
if you will) we're really
being
little more than four year olds masquerading as adults without
realizing it. Is it any
wonder
our lives and
the world
are in the shape they're in? The
answer
to this
question
is "No" - both from a conventional education's standpoint as well as
from an unconventional's. The difference is this: embedded in the
unconventional's, is the
power
to make a difference.