"I'm not making an issue of the
words
you
use.
I'm making the system from which the
words
are derived the problem. Given the system, I can't
answer
the
question.
You
see,
it's not
simply
the
words
you're
using
that are the problem. What I want to convey to you is this: in the
assumptions from which you are
asking
the
question,
you allow for no
truthfulanswer
to the
question.
The
words
you
usereflect
your assumptions accurately, and given your assumptions, there's no
solution to the problem. One cannot solve the problem in the system
you are
using.
In fact, that system is the problem. Now, I'm going to
answer
your
question,
because, you know, I came here and agreed to do that, but I want to
tell you
the truth
before I
answer
the
question.
So I'm telling you that my
answer
will make no sense if you
listen
to the
answer
in that system from which you
asked
the
question.
The
answer
is that the organization has for several years been shifting away from
a structure that has a central place or a top place from which
decisions are made and passed on. We always tried not to operate that
way,
and over the years we've become more and more successful at not
operating that
way.
The structure of just about any
ordinary
organization, however, is that
way."
...
responding to an
interviewerinquiring
"I want to know what problems you
see,
and how those changes are going to
contribute
to the
relationship
between you and your underlings in the organization."
When you
listenWerner's
response, it's
clear
he isn't merely responding to the
interviewer's
inquiryper se. Were he only doing
that, it would have been
brilliant.
Rather, he's responding unasked to where the
inquirycomes from. That's what makes his response stunning. And it's
that he's responding to where the
inquiry
comes from, that this essay addresses.
We
human beings
are enigmatic in so many
ways
(we are to me, at least).
We enact things. We run our lives. We occupy space and
time
in
the world.
Yet for the most part, we don't know
who we really are.
Wow! We do what we do, and we do a lot, and yet for the most
part, given we don't know
who we really are,
we don't even know who's doing the doing. That's enigmatic to
me. In spite of it, we don't invest much capital in the
inquiry
into
who we really are.
So when we're in a
conversation,
we're mostly
speaking
while not knowing
who we really are
- said another
way,
we're mostly unaware that we're the space that colors and shapes what
we're
talking
about (that's actually a lot closer to
the truth
than it sounds). That space is behind (ie is prior to)
what we're
talking
about. Colloquially, we
say
it's where we're coming from. And where we're coming from,
colors and shapes what we're reallytalking
about: where we're coming from, colors and shapes what we're really
saying.
Now: to
listen
for where we're coming from, rather than to
listen
for what we're
talking
about, is to
listen
for what we're really
saying.
And at best, we live like the difference between the two
listenings
is inconsequential; at worst, we're clueless that there's any
difference at all. In the above
quote from Werner which
sources this essay,
you can hear he's
listening
for and responding to where the
interviewer's
inquiry
is coming from. And I'll bet you good
money
the
interviewer
isn't aware it's where he's coming from. And I'll bet you more good
money
the
interviewer
isn't aware that where he's coming from, is
speaking
louder than what he's
talking
about.
First
listen
the
interviewer's
inquiry
above, then
imagine
what you may have said if it were you who was responding.
Imagine
what you may have responded to, and how you may have couched your
response. Now
listenWerner's
response. Notice he's not only responding to what the
interviewer
is
inquiring
about, as much as he's responding to where he's coming from. Said
another
way,
he's responding to the space that colors and shapes what the
interviewer
is really
saying.
That's what makes
Werner's
response
extraordinary,
brilliant,
stunning. And he's not just
listeningextraordinarily
on this one occasion: no, this is
the wayWerneralwayslistens.
Really.